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You picked truth. Here’s your question. Would you buy something if I told you that I’ve had a really hard year and that I was supposed to go to Miami for winter break but then my friend said she couldn’t so now I can’t go because what am I going to do in Miami alone but I’ve been waiting for this trip all year like I got my tonsils taken out this past spring because I got strep 6 times last year and I just really need to unwind and party with my friends is that too much to ask? If you answered yes, click here. If you answered no, I have a follow up question. Would you buy something...

You picked dare. I dare you to buy something. We’re having a 40% off sale. Go ahead, click here to buy something. Thanks for playing!

The email writer does not partake in any activities that could be regarded as 'inappropriate', 'obscene', or 'adult'. The email writer does not even know what 69 is. Probably the number after 68 and the one before 70. The email writer is as innocent as a caterpillar in a cocoon. The email writer would like to ask you not to go back to that email you were previously on. Just close this tab. Do not return to your email inbox today. Heck, get off the internet. Take the day to write your relative, the email writer, a handwritten letter about how much you appreciate sharing DNA with such a smart, kind, and virtuous person. Maybe include a sum of money inside. Whatever you think...

HA. I got you. Your rating didn't mean sh*t (although if you clicked the 69 button I love you). Click Here to shop the NEWEST PIT VIPERS. Click Here to shop BEST SELLERS. Click Here to shop my, your #1 email writer's, favorite pair.